What is Self-Compassion?
Dr. Kristin Neff explains the difference between compassion and self-compassion as follows:
“First, to have compassion for others you must notice that they are suffering. If you ignore that homeless person on the street, you can’t feel compassion for how difficult his or her experience is. Second, compassion involves feeling moved by others’ suffering so that your heart responds to their pain (the word compassion literally means to “suffer with”). When this occurs, you feel warmth, caring, and the desire to help the suffering person in some way. Having compassion also means that you offer understanding and kindness to others when they fail or make mistakes, rather than judging them harshly. Finally, when you feel compassion for another (rather than mere pity), it means that you realize that suffering, failure, and imperfection is part of the shared human experience. “There but for fortune go I.”
Self-compassion involves acting the same way towards yourself when you are having a difficult time, fail, or notice something you don’t like about yourself. Instead of just ignoring your pain with a “stiff upper lip” mentality, you stop to tell yourself “this is really difficult right now,” how can I comfort and care for myself in this moment?”
Why Should I Make a Self-Compassion Card?
A self-compassion card is a small creation that you can keep in your wallet, at your desk, on your nightstand, or anywhere you need the reminder.
Self-Compassion does not come easy for a lot of us. We may need reminders to be kind and supportive to ourselves. As you build this card, think about what you need to hear. If you have trouble being kind to yourself, imagine what you might tell a friend who was in your shoes.
What Do I Need?
You will need: deck of unwanted playing cards (or simply index or cardstock cut down to about that size (credit card size), construction paper, scrapbook paper, magazines for collaging, glue sticks, scissors, pencil, pen, markers, crayons, colored pencils, mod podge or card protector sleeve (optional).
Directions:
Before you begin, take a couple of slow and centering breaths. Think about an affirming, encouraging, and motivating statement that you need to hear (or tell yourself more often). Think about images that go along with this statement. If you have trouble coming up with something, pause, and imagine what you might tell a good friend in your situation. Then switch from “you” to “I” to make it an affirmation for you.
I am ____
I have ___
I will ___
Cut a piece of construction paper or scrapbook paper the size of your playing card and glue it to the front of the card.
Continue decorating your card using collage technique - layering photo imagery from magazines, drawing your own illustrations, creating a decorative border, etc.
Somewhere on the card write out your self-compassion statement.
You can use mod podge or place your card in a card protector sleeve to keep in intact longer
Carry this card in your wallet as a daily reminder and/or place near your desk or nightstand.